For years, whenever we took the submarine outside the three-mile limit, we sold tax-free cigarettes to the crew. We sold tax-free cigars, too. There was a policy, a procedure, a bureaucracy involved, but none of us thought to question whether it was a good idea for our government to aid and abet the tobacco industry this way.

Sometimes we went to sea for just one day, but we sold enough cigarettes to last the crew for a month.

The first day that we went to sea with the Brazilians, after they bought the boat, we automatically arranged a sale of tax-free cigarettes. The only problem was identifying the purchasers who could not write their names, but sailors are inventive at dealing with administrative impediments, and this turned out not to be a major obstacle.

That evening, the Brazilian skipper called me in and asked, “Tomorrow, could we get some tax-free whiskey?”

Only someone who was not going to have to deal with the bureaucrats involved would have made such a request. But it seemed like a worthwhile project to me, so I went up to the base Supply Office before we sailed the next morning. I turned the problem over to Walter, who seemed to have the most open mind of all the functionaries in that department. When we returned to port that afternoon, I asked Walter what he had found out.

He told me that the entire staff was fascinated with the idea. Of course, no U.S. Navy ship could carry alcohol for resale to its crew, but everyone thought it was a fun idea to research. Unfortunately, we could not arrange for tax-free booze through official channels, even for our foreign guests.

When I got back to the now-Brazilian submarine, I found an American civilian attempting and failing to communicate with the topside watchstander. I introduced myself and offered my assistance. The visitor turned out to be a ship’s chandler who had seen the Brazilian flag, and he wanted to present his line of tax-free goods. He asked, “Can you use any beverages?”

It turned out that we did not have to go outside the three-mile limit any more. We just took it aboard the foreign-flag ship. The Brazilians were quite appreciative of my “success” in this assignment. More than four years later I was still drinking their appreciation.